Happiness = Right now

I didn't think that there was any possible combination of genes between Thomas and I to make a baby like Addison, but we are blessed. She's my reward. She sleeps all the time. She basically lives in her bouncy seat on the coffee table by the nice warm fire. She stirs when she's hungry and may cry, may not depending on her mood. She eats well, sometimes lazily and I have to change her diaper to wake her up enough to eat some more, and then it's back to sleep.

She wakes for small periods of time during the day. Last night at about 8:00 she came to life for a couple hours. And by that I mean, she looked around the room and had her eyes open. She tried to learn how to use a binkie and then got frustrated. We put her on her tummy for a bit and she enjoyed lifting her head up (amazingly strong little one.) (This was after a lift and Thomas snapped it just as her head came down. I can't look at it because it makes me laugh so hard and laughing hurts!!! )
And then about 10:00pm I fed her and we fell asleep together on the couch.

I'm sleeping on the couch right now because I can't lay down or get back up again for that matter. This is why I wanted to avoid another C-section if I could, the recovery is a "you-know-what" especially if you're like me and just want to get back to normal! I want to clean my house and make dinners and be a normal mommy for Caelen again. It's also hard for Thomas to be working from home, trying to take care of house work, and Caelen, and find time to cuddle with his new baby girl.

The pain seems worse this time but it could be any number of things:

1) With Caelen I could just lay on the couch and be her mommy. I didn't have a toddler's demands to meet, so maybe I just wasn't as aware of the pain because I wasn't moving around as much.

2) The doctor didn't just do an incision, he cut away some old scar tissue making me think that might be harder to heal?

3) I'm older. 27 today..... LOL

4) Or baby amnesia is amazing like one nurse told me. If it wasn't, the population would die. No one would remember how awful the pain is (labor, pregnancy problems and C-section recovery) and no one would have more than one baby.

After we fell asleep (and I transfered her to her bouncy seat at about 11:00) I woke up at 3:00 in the morning and thought, "Well miss Addison, since it's been 5 hours and I'm in some serious pain from milk overload, why don't you eat?" She ate for half an hour, a good long feeding, and went back to sleep. Next thing I know I'm waking at 7:00 in the morning to Caelen calling me from her room!!!

So beautiful Addison is amazingly easy and wonderfully adorable and I thank God every day that I'm not pregnant anymore. Yes, I would rather be on drugs and in pain for weeks with my new little girl than be in that pregnant body again. I'm one happy mama today. After my Dad came to meet Addison for the first time (everyone was able to stay about 1 hour because she was born so close to visiting time ending) he said I smiled more in that small period of time than he'd seen in months. I believe it! I'm so happy. All of it is always worth it in the end.

I'm so proud of my missy moo Caelen. She has been a precious big sister. She has helped mommy change a couple of Addison's diapers.

She's put Addie's shoes on for her doctor visit. She's super good at introducing her to people. She shares with Addison and often says she wants to see or hold her baby sister.

And then she's off, playing, or singing, or reading, or just being a good girl. She's had a few temper issues, that I can't necessarily attribute to Addison's arrival, but they could be because of it. I'm very proud of her.

Two of my biggest material wishes came true these past couple of days. Thomas bought me a glider and ottoman for my birthday and it is SO comfortable! AND today he had a garage door opener installed. This will literally change my life. For 6 years I have been opening that garage door by hand. I load Caelen in the garage, open the door, get in the car, drive out, park the car. And then in any manner of awful weather, get out, close the garage door, get back in the car and then drive away. I do this AT least 4 mornings out of the week. Serious low point in my day. Very annoying, inconvienient etc. NOT ANY MORE! :) Yay! And it's so quiet.

Sooooo Thomas is out getting some things, but most importantly a Starbucks for me and we're having suhsi for dinner tonight. Yeah I think you could say I'm about as happy as it gets these days.